


Dolorem

by Splootdoot



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst, I'll add more tags as I update, anything that doesn't have to do with manberg exists, boffy is sad, excluding pogtopia, factions like rutabaga and badlands still exist, give me time im struggling how to continue with this, it does but it wasn't all that serious, the l'manberg war doesnt exist, though there may be exceptions, tommy come save him
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-14
Updated: 2020-11-14
Packaged: 2021-03-09 03:20:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,107
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27497842
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Splootdoot/pseuds/Splootdoot
Summary: this is a vent fic turned into an actual story oopsanyways, Tommy neglects boffy and he suffers.He doesn't know how to make it up to him, and decides to bring boffy to dream smp while he figures it out.
Relationships: No Romantic Relationship(s), TommyInnit & Boffy (Video Blogging RPF)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 86





	1. Chapter 1: Tommy?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is basically a copy/paste from my angsty one-shot but with a few minor changes and a different ending.

Boffy hadn't seen anyone in a long while. Hadn't talked to anyone. Hadn't had any sort of human contact, He lost count of how many days he had been alone in the first months. But that was fine, He was fine with it. His friends had to do their own thing, and that was okay. He could wait.

Boffy watched as he dumped the match onto the ground, and looked on with satisfaction as the small flame grew and grew. He smiled knowingly and stalked off. Not looking behind him as the flames spread hungrily. 

Boffy looked on as the forest had smoke sprouting from it, pleased with himself, knowing what was going to happen to the forest, as well as the animals in it. He grinned sadistically. (well, his mask did, he enchanted it to show his expressions and feelings a few months back.)

The fire would eventually consume the forest and kill everything in it. He felt satisfied, smug for some reason.

Y'know, it's would've fun with someone else around, to cause chaos with, to laugh with, but he had to make do with what he had... which was not someone. But he could handle it, being alone. Boffy was strong. strong enough, at least.

Secretly, he desperately wishes he could see his friends again, but he didn't want to annoy them. But it's okay. when they're ready they can message him.  
Boffy had repressed these feelings of desperation and loneliness and pain long ago. Until he couldn't feel them at all. Eventually, it grew to a point where he repressed most of his feelings, except his sadistic feelings of pleasure whenever he burned anything down. It might be cruel and evil, but it was his own way of escaping his own depressing thoughts and painful feelings of loneliness.

The stars burned dimly as the sky was clouded with layers of smoke. Boffy sighed as he opened the front door to his house, it had been a long day. He changed from his soot-stained clothes and tossed them into a makeshift hamper. He had to make most of his own things these days. There wasn't a store or village for miles, and he certainly wasn't putting the effort to travel who-knows-how-many-miles to buy a hamper or basket.

Boffy used to like traveling, wanting to see the world and everything it had to offer, but these days, he was just.. tired. Tired of everything. Just.. a general lack of energy. The only thing He really did these days was mine and burn things.

Boffy finally changed into his pajamas.. well not really pajamas, they were really just large shirts and pants he stole from one of his friends but they were comfortable, so they might as well be. He breathed in the long-gone scent of his friend that seemed to cling to the clothes. He knew it was creepy, but he didn't care anymore. Morals went out the window long ago. He was alone now. It wasn't like he was going to be judged anyway.

Boffy just bottled his feelings, he kept to himself. Pretending he was fine, and pretending his feeling didn't exist.

Never talked about it.

Never tried to.

Usually, he'd just distract himself. And pushed his feelings all the way back into his mind.

He sighed heavily once again as he laid in bed, he tossed and turned, he just wanted to sleep. Before 'those' thoughts resurfaced. Those thoughts that don't come out during the day. Like mobs, they come out at night, when he doesn't have the energy to repress his feelings anymore. To push the depressing thoughts out of his head anymore.

They tear any feelings that resemble happiness apart.  
They were the thoughts and feelings that he'd been repressing for months. Maybe even a year? he didn't know, all he knew was that they had been repressed for a long time now. For months he had been breaking down inside, slowly, painfully slow, and he knew that. And he always tried to distract himself, he had a small sliver of hope in his heart that maybe they would just go away, he wished they did.

Boffy shifted uncomfortably, he grabbed an extra pillow that was above his bed and he took it into his arms. He hugged it a bit tighter, at least it provided a little bit of comfort.

_your friends don't love you_

_they don't care about you_

_they forgot about you_

they hate you

_no wonder they left you_

_you're useless, worthless-_

There were more, many more. Boffy shoved his face into his pillow as his shoulders shook violently. Tears streamed from under his mask. His emotions were at an all-time high 

He was in so much pain. It hurt so bad. He wanted to make it stop. He wanted to be comforted, to be assured, to be cuddled, and have sweet nothings whispered into his ear. But he knew that'll never come. 

He cried and sobbed until he couldn't cry anymore, the only thing he felt anymore was tired.

He was still sniffling and trembling, he could at least say because he felt a bit better now. Physically, at least. 

Boffy cuddled into his pillow, at least it was over now. Though his little crackup will probably happen tomorrow too. But until then, he'll try to make the most out of it in these few moments of peace and a small amount of relief.

He only noticed it was morning when the skies started to brighten again, the dark black of night sky melting away as the sun started to rise, the void-like skies lit up.

.....

He started to drift off to sleep when his communicator started beeping.

Annoyed, he reached out to his nightstand groggily and grasped it. The dust started to rub off onto his hand as he looked at the screen. His heart nearly stopped as he stopped breathing for a second altogether as he stared at his communicator in disbelief.

_Tommyinnit joined the game_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> eddejk I have the second chapter written already as well. But I'm not sure if that's the way I wanna go, I might write another version because I'm not completely happy with the chapter I have now. Anyways, updates will come along slow, so you don't have to come check in often. 
> 
> also if you like this au/idea then feel free to use it for yourself, you can choose to give credit or not. I don't really mind.
> 
> Still haven't figured out what will compel Tommy to bring Boffy back to dream smp yet.  
> basically I'm going in blind lmao.


	2. Chapter 2: He's here.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ujdknlduo im not sure how to write tommy so please forgive me

Boffy stared at his communicator, dumbfounded. Why had Tommy wanted to visit him? Why now? Why couldn't have he visited earlier? It didn't really make sense to him, not at all. Tommy had so much time, why couldn't in that amount of time, he couldn't give him a quick hello? Maybe he got caught up in something? Now that Boffy had put more thought more into it- he felt strangely bitter and resentful. _Why?_ A scowl started to develop on his face.

Tommy stopped talking to him for months, and now he wants to come back? _after he abandoned him?_ Boffy started to feel bitterness and resentment grow. He was left in the dust- _like nothing_. But then it died down suddenly. 

The arsonist shook his head. Boffy took a deep breath. As much as he wanted to get fully angry.. he couldn't. He was lying to himself that he was angry and resentful and he knew that. He loved Tommy too much to resent him. Boffy cherished him, saw him as a sibling, a brother. He didn't want to hurt Tommy, ok well.. maybe a small punch. Anyway, he wasn't going to deck Tommy on sight. As appealing the idea sounded. Besides, he probably had his own thing to deal with. Boffy let out a deep sigh, he dropped the scowl he had before. He didn't want to think about it. He needed to cool off and relax for now.

He decided to start washing his clothes, he wanted to clear his thoughts. Deciding to push what was left of his bitter feelings down, he can always deal with it later. Grabbing the soot-covered white hoodie, his ash-covered black jeans, and he brought a sponge to clean off his mask, some flakey creosote probably got on it. That usually happened whenever he burned things and happened to get too close. Bringing the bunched-up clothes outside, he dumped them on the river bank. He'd be coming back to grab some soap. 

As much as he wanted to leave it, his mind was still searching for a reason. What was it that drove Tommy away from him? Did he even cause it? Was he.. not enough? A pang of sadness hit him. What he felt didn't matter now, he decided. All that mattered is that Tommy was on his way. He came back to him. 

* * *

Tommy was disoriented and dizzy, but it would wear off eventually. That was just traveling between worlds did to you. But regardless of that, excitement blossomed in his chest, he'll be seeing his old friend again, his amigo, his comrade! He hastily typed into his communicator, 

_whejre arde yoiu big man?_

He looked at the text, noticing the spelling mistakes but he didn't bother with it any longer. Boffy knew what he meant.

Tommy wasn't sure why he was here exactly, all he remembered was having a weird.. episode? He wasn't sure what to call it. It was odd, the experience happened yesterday night. It was really weird, it was this thing where he.. felt pain, not physical pain, but emotional pain. It wasn't all that strong, but it still hurt. He didn't know why it happened, it.. hurt. Alot. It took a while for him to recover from that, a whole night. But he ended up being recovering fast enough, Luckily.

He somewhat believed that Boffy might've had something to do with it, as crazy as it sounds. He also felt something tugging him towards here, yesterday, it felt frantic, somehow. As if it was a last attempt calling for help. He had felt it before, but not that urgent.

He had been so caught up in the war he forgot to check in with all his friends. He neglected them, and he should make it up to them. Tommy just hoped that it wasn't too late.

He missed Boffy. He missed how he and Boffy would hang out back in their old RL craft world, it was terrifying, but Boffy's presence comforted him. When he cried from frustration and fear, Boffy had hugged him. It was a little awkward, but it brought comfort for whatever reason. Something about it just... did. After he was done crying, a few days later, night fell...

* * *

Tommy had been mining for hours now, he was exhausted, yet he kept going. He was going to get the iron, no matter what. His palms were raw and sore, his feet were aching. The pickaxe he had was practically splitting into pieces, splintering at the head. It could barely keep itself together. He wouldn't even be surprised if it just snapped in half.

"Hey Tommy" he heard a voice behind him, jumping, he turned around to see a mask with a poorly drawn face on it, staring back at him. 

"Yeah?" He responded, noticing Boffy held a bottle with pink liquid in his hand.

"I can't, sorry, I'm getting iron."

Even though he couldn't see Boffy's face, he could feel his eyes scan him for a moment.

"yeah, well, you look like you could use a break, c'mon." Boffy was right, he felt like shit, everything was sore, he could use a break. 

"Just... Follow me" Boffy turned around and started to walk away, Tommy trailed behind him, confused. 

He trudged out after Boffy as they both walked out the entrance of the tunnel.

"Take this" He slowly registered as a potion was held out in front of him. Tommy took it slowly into his own hand, it felt somewhat soothing against his hand.

"You look like crap, figured I'd make you something" He heard his friend say as he chugged the potion, it was sweet and fruity.. and oddly cold, refreshing, but cold? Potions didn't come out cold, you'd had to freeze it first. 

"Why's it cold?" He asked.

Boffy shrugged "I've heard regen potions were better cold, so I got ice and managed to cool it" Tommy's hands started to feel better already, and the pain in his feet started to dull and fade slowly. 

"Anyways, follow me, I have something for you." Boffy walked to the front door, and looked back at him, he shot Boffy a grateful look before following him.

They walked away from the entrance of their small base, Tommy silently prayed that the lava monsters would stay away this time. It made him worry, it was night time already. There was a higher chance they would spawn, rising from the depths of the lava pool.

The boys walked for a little while until they staggered up a hill, the crickets chirped and chittered amongst each other. It was mostly silent, Tommy noted, except their feet ruffling the grass. No wind rustling the leaves of trees, Tommy couldn't even feel a breeze. it seems the clouds that covered the sky were absent as well. It was an okay temperature, not freezing, not boiling. Just fine. 

When they finally got to the top, Tommy got confused.

There was a red and white checkered blanket set out on the grass, it looked like it was made from a thin fabric, the type of fabric you'd see on stands in a plaza or marketplace. it also seemed messily stitched together. 

"I 'borrowed' some things from a village nearby" He heard Boffy say.

 _Well, that explains it._ The blonde thought.

Tommy shot him a confused look. "That's it?" 

"Nope. Anywayys" Boffy drawled. "That isn't what I wanted to show you, There's one more thing"

He watched as Boffy walked to the checkered blanket on the ground and sat down. He patted the spot beside him, signaling for Tommy to come over.

As soon as Tommy took up the spot next to him, Boffy looked at him "Lay down" he said. 

Tommy and Boffy laid on the thin blanket, and they looked up at the night sky.

He always loved the night sky, it was one of the rare moments where he can just.. relax and take a break. Admiring the stars while slowly forgetting how many things went wrong with the day.

It was.. beautiful, the black sky. Blue and purple mixed beautifully while it draped across the void-like sky, acting like some sort of veil. The stars were spread across the sky, freckled across the pitch black. 

Tommy could see the glowing moon in the corner of his eye, looking elegant as always. The whole thing looked.. almost unreal, Ethereal, even.

Tommy sat back up, Boffy followed suit.

"That was amazing, thanks, man." He smiled brightly at him.

Boffy shrugged, "Least I could do, after.. y'know" He gestured vaguely.

"yeah.." The smile on his face had dropped.

Tommy smiled widely again as he spotted a shooting star. "Look!" he pointed at the falling speck of white.

"Make a wish Boffy!" He turned to the other boy with an excited expression.

"Ok, hmmm," Boffy thought aloud.

"I've got it."

"OK, I wish those lava fuckers would leave us alone." The sentence emitted a small chuckle from Tommy 

The blonde laid back down on the blanket, he heard his friend do the same. He wanted to stay a little longer, who knows how long he'll have a moment like this again.

"Hey Boffy" 

"Yeah, Toms?" Tommy was a bit taken aback by the nickname, he'd never heard Boffy call him that before.

A pause.

......

"Thank you"

* * *

The boy managed to pull himself from out of his thoughts, all that mattered right now is that he needed to check in with Boffy. He started to look around.

The spawn-place looked... spooky, he was in a pine forest, a taiga is it? He had read books with Tubbo while it was raining outside, he had read a book about biomes once. The place looked similar to the pictures in the book, except.. more barren. Tree branches were bare, and they looked... dark. They looked charred almost. He looked around uneasily. There weren't any animals around either, no chirping of birds, no squabbling of squirrels. Just silence. It was eerie. 

Tommy looked down at his communicator and smiled. Boffy had responded and had given him the coords to his location.

He turned on his heel and made his way towards Boffy's place with a grin.

Tommy was going to see his friend again.

* * *

Tommy let out an annoyed huff, why the fuck was Boffy's house so far? His feet were killing him as well. The only thing he could hear was his own feet stepping on the oddly dark grass. For anyone else, they would hear complaining mumbles of the boy.

On the Dream SMP things weren't usually this far, only a couple hundred blocks. Even then, he had a horse to ride. As he walked through a meadow, he took a moment to absorb the scene, The wind rustled the leaves of trees, he still didn't hear birds chirping, for whatever reason. He spotted cows, sheep, and.. small dots? Tommy squinted harder and saw small floating shapes, he realized what they were, bees. _bees._ Tubbo always loved them, for some reason. He personally didn't like them all that much, and the bees didn't really like him either.

One time those fuckers once tried to stab the shit out of him when he tried to take their honey when Tubbo was gone and accidentally knocked their hive down. He had gotten out fine, luckily, though he was just soaked after he was forced to jump into the nearest river in an attempt to escape the angry insects. Tubbo thought it was deserved, but Tommy didn't think so. They could always just make more honey after all. How important was it really?

He actually kinda missed Tubbo already, even though he didn't want to admit it. He's only been gone for a couple of hours though. And No, he isn't clingy at all.

Tommy let out heaving breaths, it had been a long trek, and he may or may not have run halfway there, but that didn't matter now. He took a look at Boffy's house, it was a cave, but it looked like Boffy had turned it into a house. Somewhat similar to his, but rougher and smaller, and with windows. As he got closer, he could spot moss patches and grass creeping their way onto the cobblestone of Boffy's house. There also seemed to be flower buds on the grass as well. He walked up to the front door with a shout _"BOFFY! BIG MAN! IM HERE!"_ as he knocked. 

He grinned again, today was going to be great, amazing even.


	3. Chapter 3

oof, uh im sorry to announce but uh  
writer's block  
sorry, chapter would have to be delayed. My apologies

**Author's Note:**

> also if you like this au/idea then feel free to use it for yourself, you can choose to give credit or not. I don't really mind.


End file.
